Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The only way is forward.

I cut my hair
I washed my floors
I am done with angry emails
the broken reckord in my head has resorted to whispers

and I ask him do you want to go to playschool
No, I quit... he says
Are you sure... do you want to go?

I am so afraid of the answer... because he would tell me.
No I quit....

I sigh in relief...

And now I watch him with his bunch of brothers...playing... laughing
now and then rushing to the piano playing little pieces of music, because that is his stim.
Constant music.

he is so lucky to have them
they are his playschool

He is happy.


  1. Awww, I know this must be bittersweet. I'm so sorry the school did not work out. I know you must want him to be learning with other kids, but at least he does have brothers at home and he is happy. It's a hard road.

  2. You know if it's what works for him then it's where he needs to be right now. Sometimes its harder on us than them--for us to see them struggle and have so much anxiety.


  3. he is a love xoxoxoxoxoxo
    there is really nothing more painful than seeing the anxiety of our children
    and nothing more wonderful than seeing them happy

  4. It does sound as though it's working out for now, glad that all your kids can play together :)

  5. I agree with Floortime Lite Mama. I'm sorry it didn't work out at school, I know you fought so hard for that. He's lucky to have brothers at home who he is happy and can feel comfortable with. And you know you made the right decision, he'll learn so more while he's happy!!


    PS. I just tagged you for the Kreativ Blogger Award!

  6. :) So glad he's happy! And glad he's still playing the piano (stim or not.)