Thursday, November 11, 2010

Nothing unspecified just ordinay autism whatever that is.

Sturla is diagnosed with typical autism, nothing unspecified about it. He scored zero on language when he was three years old. I disagreed, I heard words but they the diagnosers did not and when I told them that he used his words appropriatly I got the pity look. He spoke this beautiful gibberish that sounded like language but hidden inside were those gems, words and meaning.
So this is what he got on his third birthday, because that was the day of his diagnosis, we spent it at the clinic, ordinary autism no language and mild mental retardation. And have a nice day.
I think I lost my mind that day.
I wanted to believe that he could and would be able to do anything. I still want to believe that.
Two years, two playschools and so many tears and work hours later this is where we are.
We still have mountains of work ahead in language and in social interaction and that work may very well never be over.
Interacting with peers is the hard part, as for all our kids. He follows the routines like the others and he adjusted very quickly to his new play school. The routine is very cut and square, so it works out perfectly for him.
Not much room for insecurity when you are on a tight schedule.
He has trouble in crowded noisy areas where everyone is getting dressed at the same time, but still the staff manages somehow to structure the environment very tightly. They do this, not for him it is just the policy of the school.
I am happy that he adjusting well. :) I am just very very greedy as well. Always on the lookout for deficits, as depressing as that is. Looking for flaws is what drives the program it is hard to fix things one does not see or acknowledge.
Staying happy and critical at the same time is my challenge but it is nothing compared to the challenges that face my child.
I watch his peers and how they chatter and interact and Sturla sits in line, yes but he is quiet and just waiting. This is mostly when they are going out and dressing in their warm winter clothing. In other situations he is more animated and lively and he is funny.
When he starts exchanging comments, just one or two with his peers my happiness level will rise considerably. that is what I want to happen very much sooner than later.


  1. Our boys are VERY alike, 'ordinary' autism and a zero on language at assessment. You and I are also very alike in our hopes, it is lovely to read about someone else who thinks the same way, thank you:) Jen

  2. it most certainly will
    he will soon start interacting I am sure
    Though the road ahead is still so long dont forget to remember how far he has already come

  3. I will try and remember, he has come far that is true. :)